Friday, March 15, 2013

Snake?! SNAKEEEE~~~~~

It's not Solid Snake I'm talking about now ,
but rather it's the year of the Snake.
The Chinese New Year has come & gone ,
& my holidays have also come to its end .

(I know it's a little bit late to write about CNY ,
 but I actually started this post one week after the CNY ,
 but somehow I couldn't finish it until now...which is 1 month late...)

I've stayed in Penang for more than a month during this break ,
& spent most of it working part time at a dried meat (bak gua) shop..
the wages were not bad & I've witnessed some..
"behind the scene reality"...
I'm not going into full details about that ...
so that's all I could say about it...

During this break I've come to realization upon certain things ..
things that I couldn't really find the right words to describe properly,
but I will try my best to write it down..

The truth is ,
I have A LOT of unfulfilled goals hanging around over the years ..
not to mention LOTS of wasted potential & missed opportunities...
Sure there were some progressions here & there ...
but on the bigger picture , I've only accomplished SO LITTLE..

Then there's another thing...
It's about my social life...
Now when a guy talks about having troubles in his social life ,
it's a no-brainer about what's really at stakes here...

I'm a guy with emotions needs,
just like any other dudes out there ...
but given that I have dozens of other priorities
that I should be taking care of at this stage of my life,
& of course along with low self-esteem,  lack of self-confidence 
& the fear of taking risks among many other excuses...
I've thus convinced myself to stay out of the temptations
& to suppress my inner desires with rational
as best & as much as I humanely could...
In order to avoid getting any unfavorable outcomes...

I suppose I should be glad to have befriended
some of the girls that I've met over the years ,
though things didn't really developing as I initially wanted ,
but perhaps it became something else along the way ,
something I didn't expected...but I'm glad it did...
I've learn quite a lot & have many memorable moments
out of these unexpected turns of events...thanks to the girls..

There are still a lot I need to learn & to experience ,
Socializing is all about learning & understand other people better,
even get to know ourselves better through human interactions,
& so I'm really glad & grateful to have met them ,
Without them , I wouldn't be me today.

Oh well, hopefully I will get to socialize better
& making more progression in this Snake year