May 4th or May be?

I haven't been writing anything since my last birthday rant ,

not that there are anything interesting to write about anyway...

It's been 2 years since the incident that caused me huge setbacks ,

so now I've finally back to where I was (with a bit more to spare)..

I even gotten myself a new rig using that extra bit ,

as I told myself :"It's time to properly reward myself for real this time "

During the last 2 years my main focus was to try to recover what I've lost in that incident ,

& in order to reach that goal as soon as possible I've decided not to doing anything else .

Occasionally I do day dream about what could've been if I didn't have that setback ,

but then again Covid would still happened and I probably wont be doing anything differently anyway.

I thought I'd have regain back my confidences ,back to where I was before the setbacks , 

back to the good o' hopeful me once I've done recovering the loss ...

but I thought wrong...yet again...

not the 1st time & I got a strong feeling that it's not going be the last time I'm wrong 

so I guess I'll have to start get used to it...

No matter what lies I convinced myself , things will never  truly be back to how it was.

This year will be yet another may be after all...