May 4th , known as Star Wars Day to the SW fans , it's a grand day for celebration .
But as my 30th birthday , not much celebration is going on .
It's definitely a 'memorable' birthday ,but in a kinda bad way as the world has gone into a dire situation with the Covid-19 virus outbreak & lockdowns , so no gatherings or celebrations can be done.
On a second thought , perhaps I should view this lockdown in a positive light as it at least give me an valid excuse of not being able to celebrate my birthday .
Truth be told , nothing makes me happy anymore these days...
I don't feel happy on my birthday ,& I don't feel happy on any day in 2020 so far ...
Oh if you are wondering , my birthday wish is still the same as last year ,
though I'm beginning to think having an unfulfillable birthday wish is perhaps a way of punishing myself .
At least James can choose to be with Maria , but such option is not possible out here in the real world for me...
Let's see if the rest of 2020 will be able to surprise me ..
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