I was going to write something last month ,
because February did have its...moments
but I just couldn't find the right words to write 'em down..
Well, better late than never .
though sometimes , being late itself is as good as never..
still , I will try to write something down now.
I had spent times with solitary ,
of course I wasn't completely alone ,
I had friends , I still do ,
but we just don't spend as much time as we did back then.
I thought I would've gotten used to loneliness by now ,
after all it's just back to how I used to live years ago .
But quite frankly , it isn't the same ...
it feels even worse than last time...
when you have nothing much to begin with ,
you may feel a bit down sometimes when you compare with others ,
but you won't feel the pain of 'losing' , because you never had a thing to lose.
But once you had someone
someone that complete your empty space ,
and then you lost it ,
you are not simply back to how it was ,
you will also experiencing the 'lost' that comes with it ,
It's an on going effect ,
one that probably won't be gone any time soon ,
&'s it's going to get worse with time .
What's making it worse is that while one may be devastating with the lost ,
the other simply move on and probably feel way more happy than before ...
Not my best writing pieces , but who cares ?
The bottom line is :
She is happy ,
I AM NOT.